Episode 64: Becoming an Unhurried Leader

February 14, 2022


From content creation, meeting with the team, checking the tasks off of the to-do list to learning how to use all the new systems and supporting the clients. This doesn’t even take into account the fact that we have a spouse or kids, a home, dinner to cook or laundry to fold, a baseball game to drive to or a parent that might need us. The list never ends. And as a result, the only option seems to be – hurry, rushing from one thing to the next. 

What if I were to tell you that that was me a few years ago. And because of this, I started to look at the few leaders I could find who seemed to do it differently. They had this lightheartedness, a clarity that I just lacked; they were able to actually be present and not rushed. They were even experiencing many moments of whitespace and margin in their days and at the same time, they were epically prolific in their work, and incredibly connected and successful in their homes. 

So, I set out to see what made all the difference. And today I bring that to you!


[3:56] The Common Thread

We hosted a retreat for our Luminary Leadership Incubator members who are all successful business owners. We read through 23 forms of the members who were accepted to really get an understanding of where they were at, what they were struggling with, what their focus was on and what they needed most from us.

The common thread between all 23 of them was that their greatest pain and their greatest desires were not necessarily the amount of money they wanted to make or the fact that they were just having struggles with their team; the common thread was that they all felt so hurried and spread so thin.

[7:14] What Is the Difference?

There was a stage that we were in too where it felt this way. 

I started to become aware of how it was affecting our kids. I always felt like I was rushing them out the door. Whatever we were going to do was budding right up against the end of whatever we just finished. I was constantly just hustling them out the door or quickly rushing off in the morning to get to work or going from one meeting to the next.

So, I started to study the people who didn’t live that way. They didn’t force it on their kids. It wasn’t a part of their marriage. It wasn’t how they did business. And they were mega successful in all of those areas. 

What is it that differentiates the people who are in a constant state of hurry and stress from the ones that aren’t? 

[9:20] The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry

I read a book that I highly recommend, called The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry

This book blew my mind. I started to realize that the more I took on the more hurried I’d get. But to quote the author: “The solution to an over busy life is not more time. It’s to slow down and simplify our lives around what really matters.” As I started tapping into it more, I realized that that’s exactly what these people are doing. They built their lives around what mattered most, what brought them joy, what allowed them to be in their zone of genius, both in business and in their personal lives. 

After experiencing this wake up call, I realized that this is one of the most common struggles across the board of everyone we serve and work with, and something had to change. But when I tried to hunt down resources to support in doing this, I just kept coming across more productivity stuff. So, I sat down with my team and I started to think about what do our people need more than anything; what did Michael and I do to transition from this life of constant hurry and stress to a life we actually want to be living.

[12:27] Unhurried Leadership 

We have created a workbook and a process that you can download for free at https://luminaryleadershipco.com/unhurried/.

This process is going to take you from a hurried and stressed business owner into unhurried leadership with clarity. It’s nothing complicated and within one hour of going through this process, your life can shift and change forever.

This free workbook is full of exercises to help you slow down, get out of the weeds and focus your ever growing to-do list down to the things that matter most and will make the biggest impact on your business, on your life, on your family and on your legacy. 

[14:47] Vision and Finding Patterns 

Step one is visualizing your future. What I found works best here is to step out of your logical, task-oriented side of your brain and allow yourself to dream without any inhibition. Because what you’re going to realize is likely the vision that you have, is not in congruent with where you are going. The workbook walks you through some different ways you can do this in 5  to 10 minutes.

Step two is identifying what balls are getting dropped. This requires extreme humility and honesty. In the workbook, there’s a section for your business and a section for your personal life, meaning family and everything outside of business. You have to look at the patterns. What are the things that are consistently not getting done, despite the fact that you know they’re important, or that they would change your reality for the better? 

[19:33] Things You Don’t Enjoy and Things Only You Can Do

The third step is identifying what areas you don’t enjoy. There are plenty of things that we have to do that don’t bring us joy, but we have to do them because they’re a part of functioning in everyday life. But there are a lot of things that you’re doing that don’t bring you joy, that are not critical to the vision that you just casted on your life. 

Step four is “I’m the only one that can.” I’m not saying this in the sense of the things that we convince ourselves we’re the only ones that can do them, like create graphics in our business, or write the blog. I’m talking about the things in your business and your life that only you can do, only you should do. And this list needs to be small. Really think about this one before you jump at answering and identify the things in your life that truly are only for you. 

[22:03] Limitations, Possibilities and Non-Negotiables 

Step five is “own your limitations.”  This means identifying your weaknesses and really taking ownership of them. You cannot do everything, you should not do everything. Acknowledging those limitations is really vital and it’s an important part of the pathway to your actual freedom in your schedule. Once you do that, you need to also identify the things you can do, things you can take on that won’t lend itself to more hurry.

Step six is identifying your non-negotiables. If you fail to draw a line in the sand and really clarify what actually is important to you, you’re going to end up doing everything that’s expected of you. And newsflash – it’s not going to be in alignment with where you actually want to go. You have to have that clear purpose driving you forward and you don’t want to keep defaulting to what other people think is right for you. These non-negotiables are the things that follow your values and your principles. And they clearly define what you will and will not allow.

[25:12] Think About Your Business 

Step seven is “what do you like best about your business?” What do you love about what you do? What are the projects or tasks that you can totally lose track of time when you’re working on them? Having awareness of what excites you is so important because it’s the clue into your unique gifts that only you can bring into your business. So, don’t think too hard. Just write what comes to mind. 

Step eight is “what does your dream business look like?” What are the things your mind always wanders to, but something’s gotten in the way of you making them a reality? If you’re clear about what your biggest dreams are, when it comes to your business, you’ll have an easier time letting go of control and letting go of something that no longer serves you. There might be elements of your business that are holding you back from your dream business.

[26:29] Make Room for What Matters Most and Put It In Your Calendar 

Step nine is making room for what matters most. Every decision, even the most exciting ones come with loss. It’s time to make a “best yes” list and a “not for me” list. Try to keep this list short. There’s a reason these things have fallen down the list in terms of priority. And by focusing on fewer things, you’re going to narrow that to-do list. 

Step ten is to schedule it on your calendar. I want you to treat your dreams and your “best yeses” like it’s one of your clients. You would never be so out of integrity that you tell your client you’re showing up and you just don’t show. But yet somehow you live completely out of integrity for what matters most to you. If it’s not in your schedule, it’s not happening. Commit to the smallest of things. It’s how things are going to change.

[27:56] Unhurried Leader 

You do not have to live in a hurry. You do not have to feel like life is this perpetual hamster wheel that you just can’t catch a break from. There are so many opportunities for you to live a life full of purpose and joy and possibility. 

But it’s not going to happen by chance.

If today’s episode spoke to you and if you’re ready to go from being a hurried and stressed business owner to becoming an unhurried leader with clarity, head on over to https://luminaryleadershipco.com/unhurried/ and download our free workbook.

Please leave us a review and be sure to hit the follow button so you don’t miss out on the next episode. Come connect with me on Instagram @elizhartke!  If there’s a topic, a question or a guest you want to hear on the show, just reach out and share that. We do this for you so the more you tell us, the more we can serve.


Add a comment
+ show Comments
- Hide Comments



The 30-minute, step-by-step guide to gain clarity, get out of the weeds of your business, and get more needle moving things done in way less time.

get me focused!

On the Air

The Luminary Leadership Podcast

We take the guesswork out of unlocking your full potential as an entrepreneur. We'll give you the secrets to make more money, create more freedom, and have more margin, all while still making your family a priority...

tune in

Our Services

We love serving ambitious entrepreneurs like you who are ready to break through to their next level of potential in business, leadership, and live. This is how we do it!


Browse By Category

Business Strategy




Emails people are clamoring over and talking about... 

You're no ordinary leader. You're building your dream differently — with your values and family in tact, and your potential uncorked! This is the spot where I share the super personal stuff to the behind-the-scenes of what works (and what doesn't) in our business. It's also where we can chat!

See ya in the inbox!

Join the No Ordinary
Leader Community


Creating Influential Leaders in Entrepreneurship: BTS + big news only shared to my insiders!