PARENTHOOD IS HARD.
As parents, we’re presented with continual and constant challenges and stressors. Parenthood is not for the faint of heart. Simply providing the basics for your kids can feel all encompassing some days, requiring us to give it our all.
As entrepreneurs we have chosen a different path than mainstream society and the fact of the matter is – we have made this choice, not just for ourselves, but also for our families by default. Maybe you didn’t plan it that way. Maybe you thought (like most of us do) that entrepreneurship will be your own little lane that you can work in, and then you’ll have a separate lane as a parent. But the truth is that those two worlds cross because you are the common thread in both, and you are in both all day every day.
If we want to pass the best of this world onto our kids, no matter what direction they choose, we’re going to have to do some extra work, because they are not going to get it from society, from the school system, from what they see on social media, and from the garbage content that’s being put out and directed at our kids. The good news is that I do not believe that the answer is to just work harder and push harder, I believe that the answer is in the small things, the simple tweaks that we can make and the simple things that we do each and every day that are going to result in empowering our children to discover their own creativity, capacity , influence and power.
Preparing them for the work they will ultimately choose might just be our life’s most important work. So, today’s episode is all about raising kids in an entrepreneurial family. It is a different path. It’s one with so much possibility and so much goodness, but it has its own set of challenges that we have to learn how to face. Today, we’re talking all about what it means to raise kids in an entrepreneurial family and how you can make the absolute most of this incredible gift that you’re giving them.
Let’s raise them up right!
IN THIS EPISODE, WE COVER:
[4:20] Get Yourself to Camp Luminary!
If you haven’t thought of joining Camp Luminary, I want to let you know what it’s all about. First of all, we have upleveled it. It now includes the very first mastermind for entrepreneurial parents and their kids.
I understand what it feels like to feel guilty when you are working, like you should be with the kids- and then stressed when you are with the kids because you should be working. And on top of that, feeling like you are at max capacity, just stressed and spread thin and hurried and you know it’s not the life you want to live. You know that’s not what’s best for your kids. But how do you get out of it?
And then you look at your kids and you wonder- Are they being influenced by their environment? Are we even connected anymore? Am I even able to influence them positively to support them to tap into who they are called to be? I see insecurities rising up but I want them to be confident and courageous. So how do I do that?
This experience at Camp is literally going to have you come into camp one way and leave as a different person, as a different family. We are designing Camp to have the mastermind lead up to camp and then bookend you coming out of it. This is the only time we are going to include a mastermind with Camp Luminary so I hope you will take advantage!
This is an investment in your family’s future. This is an investment in your quality of life and your calling. This is an investment in your children. You will learn what is required of you, what tools you need to equip yourself to model leadership for your children so they can become the leaders they are called to be.
We have amazing guest speakers lined up. You won’t believe the people you are going to be sitting at picnic tables with – a lot of people’s podcasts you listen to or you have seen them speak on stage. It’s going to be a special, life-changing weekend.
Get yourself to Camp! Go to luminaryleadershipco.com/camp to sign up!
Rooms are going super fast so if this is on your heart, if you feel called to this- be there with us!
[7:10] What Inspired You To….
If you ask entrepreneurs, they’ll tell you that they chose this path either because it was modeled to them and they believed it was the best route for them or because they wanted a better life than what they grew up in.
If you ask this same question to people who ran in the other direction from the world of entrepreneurship, they’ll tell you that it’s because entrepreneurship represented disengaged parents, and they felt like the business took priority and there was no freedom and no escape from work.
So, let’s take a second to think about what would, years from now, our children say about how their childhood shaped their decisions, about the work and life that they choose? Today, we’re gonna walk through five questions to ask yourself in order to help you be more intentional about the stories you’re creating today that your kids will tell when asked what inspired you to (fill in the blank)
[8:50] Do You Talk Shop?
The first question, are you talking shop in front of your kids?
Too often we try to separate our “CEO” selves from our “mom or dad” selves. When I think back on my childhood, being raised by small business owners and entrepreneurs, I remember a lot of conversations around the dinner table (and often the breakfast table as well and in the pockets of the day and in the car) that were about the business.
The idea of talking shop is to stop separating those two worlds. The work that we’re doing here and the programs that we’re bringing to life is to help you integrate and find harmony between family and business, not to feel the pressure of being split between two worlds. It’s a gift to our kids to speak to the joys, the challenges, the possibilities, the choices around entrepreneurship.
So, are you having those conversations in front of your kids at all? Or do you have really hard lines and hard boundaries between your work life and your family life?
[10:10] What Does Talking Shop Look Like?
Talking shop can be done really powerfully for our kids and it also can be a detriment to our kids because it can make a huge impact in how they view the possibilities of entrepreneurship.
So, how are you presenting the idea of work? Are your kids seeing it as serving and making a difference in the world and a positive sacrifice for something that you’re working towards or are they seeing work as something to be endured or tolerated?
The way that you position the conversation around challenges and struggles of your business is really critical for your kids. Sometimes we feel so much guilt when we’re working that we look at work through that lens of guilt and we don’t want to expose our kids to it. Because if I’m feeling so guilty, it must be the shameful thing that I have to keep behind closed doors instead of saying: “This is the engine for our family’s mission” and having conversations around it.
It’s okay to talk about the challenges. But are you talking about the challenges as a victim or as a leader?
[12:20] What Are You Modeling For Your Kids?
What is being modeled for your kids?
Kids are going to hear more of what you do than what you say. You can teach them about what it means to be an entrepreneur, you can tell them about all the perks of it, but if they’re seeing you stressed to the max, if they’re seeing you not handle your emotions well, if they’re seeing you bury your stressors, they will believe that. They’re witnessing it. They’re seeing it real time and they’re believing what you do more than what you say.
We have such incredible opportunities as entrepreneurs that other people simply don’t have. We are providing for our families in a very different way. We’re teaching what it looks like to follow your heart and take a leap of faith and take risks for the sake of a mission that was placed on your heart.
But, are you showing them that?
[14:31] Are You Consciously Living Differently?
Are we demonstrating living differently than those around us?
This is the power of entrepreneurship. We typically choose this path, because we have a clear vision of living differently than conventional norms. But sometimes what happens is we build a business that requires so much of us that we build a job.We chose to live differently, yet sometimes we model the same life that we would have had had we been in corporate and gone down the conventional route.
So, are you consciously living differently? You have opportunities to be generous with your gifts and your time because you’re flexible. You have opportunities to build your business differently in the way that you serve and show up for others. You have opportunities to live your day-to-day differently.
[16:05] Can They See the Possibility?
What are you working towards as a family? Why are you working so hard? What’s available to your kids that wouldn’t be available had you not chosen this path? Are you talking about the vision for the future? Are you including them in the conversation? Do they even know how their lives are different from someone else’s life that isn’t in this world?
Can your kids see that possibility?
We talk all the time about all the lives that are going to change if we stay the course, if we put in the work, if we work together as a family and we all contribute in whatever ways we’re called to contribute.
I remember being a kid and having no idea that there was a life outside of being a small business family. My parents had ultimate flexibility but they worked really freaking hard. It was what I knew until I went to school and got to an age where I was starting to go to friends’ houses after school. It was weird for me to see that their dad doesn’t come home until 6 pm, or that both parents are working and my friend is home alone. Sometimes, I was even jealous because I had to go to my mom’s or my grandad’s office after school instead of going home and watching TV like many of my friends.
But in retrospect, so many of the lessons I was gifted in life were in what I witnessed through being a part of that and seeing that possibility for our family if we stayed that course, if we were generous and kind, if we worked with integrity.
So, can your kids see that possibility? Are you painting those pictures with them?
[18:58] Entrepreneurial-Minded Kids
Now, here are two bonus questions for you: (1) how were you raised to be entrepreneurial? and (2) how are you intentionally raising entrepreneurial- minded kids?
When I say entrepreneurial-minded kids, I’m not saying you’re choosing their career path for them. They could choose a different path; they could choose to be a teacher or a nurse or work in corporate or whatever it might be. But the entrepreneurial mind and the entrepreneurial spirit is a gift to anybody, no matter the path they choose.
I feel like now more than ever, the world needs leaders who are equipped to get the big things done. The world needs the rebels and the rule breakers, the change makers and the leaders. That’s who we are as entrepreneurs and it’s our job to raise them. They are gifted to us and our entrepreneurial family for a reason. So, let’s do our part to equip them with what they truly need.
The most powerful thing that we did as a family was identifying our guiding light in this process, the integration of these two worlds – family and business, and really finding what we call our true north. So, I have an exercise for you that’s going to be so grounding and so clarifying for you as you go on this mission to raise these incredible leaders in your entrepreneurial family. You can download our free workbook https://luminaryleadershipco.com/truenorth.
I hope today’s episode gave you what you need to start setting your family apart and painting possibilities for your children; and if you need some help getting started, make sure to download our free workbook at https://luminaryleadershipco.com/truenorth.
Come connect with me on Instagram at @elizhartke and if there’s a topic, a question or a guest you want to hear on the show or an idea you have for us, just reach out and share that.
We do this for you so the more you tell us the more we can serve!
RESOURCES FROM THIS EPISODE:
- Sign up for Camp Luminary here!
- Get your Raising Luminaries True North Workbook here!
- Did this episode resonate with you? Help spread the message by rating and leaving a review for the show here!
- Connect with me on Instagram!
