“I feel spread too thin.”
This is a common thread that I hear across all my clients, listeners, mastermind members and really just in conversations with my peers and friends.
A lot of entrepreneurs believe that with more time and success comes more peace and freedom. But there are people who have had many years under their belts and massive levels of success who still feel like they’re being split in two. Many of them have the consciousness to create schedules that give them the space to be with family or to honor the things that matter, but they still feel pulled in too many directions. So, how do we break free of that feeling?
Today, I’m walking you through what has helped me shift from that feeling of being spread too thin to having more capacity and to feel more intact and more at peace as I navigate a very full life. It is admittedly a work in progress but I have seen a lot of change that’s breathing life back into my work and connection back into my relationships and I want to share it with you.
You’ve heard me talk about it many times before but make sure you snag today’s free resource because it’s ultimately the nucleus of this whole process, you can go to snag it at https://luminaryleadershipco.com/truenorth.
It Feels Too Heavy
One of the most common struggles that I see and that I personally have experienced, and still experience sometimes, is this feeling of being spread too thin. This is especially true when it comes to more advanced entrepreneurs that I work with. It is so common. But what’s also common and problematic, is that they have this facade of making it look like everything is put together and successful, despite the fact that behind the scenes, they are feeling the heavy pressure of running that successful business and trying their best to honor the things that they say matter most to them.
Maybe they don’t have the whitespace or the capacity to take on changing their business or their organization in order to see a shift, in order to be less thinly spread and elevate themselves out of that stressful situation. Because what happens is, when we start to have the conversation of what’s necessary to get there, they feel like I’m dropping an anvil on their chest and they don’t have the capacity to take on anything more. It feels too heavy to take on another thing so it’s almost easier for them to live in the pain of this pressure of being spread too thin because they know it, they’re used to it. But guess what is the alternative? Continuing to spiral downward.
Let Go of How You Think It Has to Be
So, how do we change that reality? Well, you do it in all the ways you’re most avoiding. You do hire the coach that is in alignment with your values and is going to take you where you want to go, you do join the mastermind of people who are going to be in that boat with you and hold you accountable to the person you say you’re becoming, you do implement the workouts today, you do spend time with the kids, you do honor your marriage. Little by little you change how you operate, you change that operating system, you break bad habits and you adopt new ones. I’m not saying you change everything, or throw everything away, or do it at the sacrifice of your income, but you start to just become.
Sometimes, we are so used to strategizing and planning for our business that we do that in our day-to-day lives; we strategize and plan for the day we’re going to be healthy, we strategize and plan for the time we’re going to have a great marriage, we strategize and plan for the well adjusted, loving, empathetic kids that we’re going to raise but we don’t actually live out the actions.
It doesn’t have to start with these grandiose plans to change your entire business strategy to free you up or change your entire way of living to start to step into who you’re called to be. It starts with honoring priorities first, living in integrity with who you say you are and who you want to be every day.
Know What You Want
Know what you want in the granular of the day to day, not just the big vision. Each day matters. Each moment matters. Each choice you make matters. Does your schedule honor how you want to feel? Do your investments of time, money and focus reflect who you’re choosing to become? If they don’t, this is where we start to adjust. The granular of the day to day is where you ultimately craft the person you’re becoming.
Something to help you along the way is our free True North workbook that you can get at https://luminaryleadershipco.com/truenorth/. This exercise will help you get incredible amounts of clarity and purpose behind your priorities and your values.
Know Your Priorities
The ways in which we say things and the words we use really matter:
- “I have time for that.” This is what you prioritize.
- “I’ll make time for that.” This is what’s less important to you.
- “I’ll try and find time for that.” This is not a priority, the likelihood of it getting done is small.
You have to start shifting what you have time for, because a lot of us have time for business, but we make time for our kids and then we find time for our spouse, or we make time for our workout but we’ll find time to rest, or we’ll find time to learn and grow. Start having time for what matters most.
Who is Holding You Accountable
Character is who you are when no one’s looking. So, make sure people are looking. We’re human, a lot of us make choices that we shouldn’t make in the darkness so shine a light on it.
Who is there watching you? Who is there holding you accountable? Surround yourself with people who honor your priorities, who want to lift you up in those priorities and see that you’re spread so thin and want to remind you that the choices you make affect how thin you will be spread.
Just Be It
Don’t wait and try and work up to or hope to become who you should be. Show up as them today, and when you fail, show up as them again tomorrow. Because you will fail. You will fall short of who you say you’re called to be, who you know in your heart you want to be, it will spread you thinner, but how you show up the minute after you’ve done it wrong, is what matters.
Show up as that person. You don’t want to be spread too thin? Then don’t be spread thin. Don’t be the person who says yes to the things that take you away from your family, don’t set the goals that fill your ego but don’t fill your soul.
What Can Go?
If you feel like you have nothing to give to the journey that’s required of you to get out of the state and the season that you’re in, what can go? What narratives are you holding on to, what ideas are you thinking of that aren’t serving you, what beliefs do you have that don’t serve you?
Can you outsource your tasks, can you gain the support that you need?
Feeling being spread thin comes from choices, comes from perspective, comes from what you’re reaching for and what you’re filling in the gaps of your life with. This process starts with knowing who you are, knowing where you’re being called, and then building that strong foundation of priorities and values that you could rattle off in a heartbeat because it is who you are and it is your heartbeat.
So, are you being spread too thin? If so, I hope this episode helps you find a better way.
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